The A&E crisis of 2013.

 

Hi kids, I want to talk to you about one of the biggest crises in the 21st century.

Oh no, it’s not September 11th. Or that tsunami from 2004 in Sri Lanka. I’m not even going to confront you with AIDS statistics today. Nope, this is really bad stuff.

Brace.your.selves.

A&E suspended Phil Robertson.

AAAAAAAAAAAAH NO THE HUMANITY FIRST AMMENDMENT AAAH THANKS OBAMA

So one time Phil Robertson did an interview with GQ. Why GQ even interviewed this man is beyond me…like…I don’t know they seem like the kinda folks that just wouldn’t hang out together. Anyway, so basically the interview takes a turn toward the topic of gay marriage. And Phil tells it exactly like he sees it. And I mean exactly.

Now, this man isn’t an idiot, he started a multi-million dollar company. He knew it would cause backlash. Or at least, I would think he would…

Anyway, so A&E freaks a little bit, because “oh crap, people aren’t going to like this.” and suspends Phil from their show. And we’re shocked why…?

Now, I personally find it a little funny, because I’m just going to assume the whole family thinks fairly similarly, but that’s beside the point.

But here’s the thing, agree with Phil or not, A&E is not in the wrong. They are not violating his right to free speech. He exercised it, and experienced backlash, but not a violation of rights.

Now, if A&E was the government, that might be a different story, but since A&E is a private company, this is their right.

If I walk into work and start screaming profanities at people, am I going to be fired? Yes. Will my first amendment rights have been violated? Well, no.

So not sorry, I’m not going to change my profile picture. Or share articles from obamasucks.com or anything.

Nope, I’m just gonna watch the free market in action. Now, it is true, that we can debate whether or not this was a good business decision by A&E, considering the absurd amount of people that watch Duck Dynasty, but even if it was the dumbest decision in the history of the universe, they still are not violating rights.

And considering that I can still go to WalMart and find Duck Dynasty tshirts, dvds, blankets, cups, dancing dolls (??), and a whole lot of other stuff, I don’t really feel that they are being opressed.

Also, mostly, I just wish everyone would shut up about it. Because really, no matter what side you are on, changing your profile picture and sharing quotes isn’t going to change minds.

Really.

Also, friends, I would like to point out that Obama had nothing to do with this decision, because apparently that’s a common misconception.

A man expressed his [unpopular] opinion, he got suspended from his tv show. But here’s the thing, HE CAN STILL EXPRESS THAT OPINION all he wants. Maybe I’m crazy, but I don’t think he should have too much trouble getting an interview with a media outlet.

And here’s the other thing, just because I have freedom of speech, doesn’t mean everyone everywhere has to/is going to listen to my opinion. I think Julie Andrews was/is one of the greatest performers in the history of the world all time ever. But if I email ABC and tell them this, and tell them that the world must know, they aren’t going to give me a slot on GMA to do this.

Thanks Obama, you’ve destroyed the constitution again. Or maybe it’s just that no one really cares that much about Julie Andrews anymore and letting me have a spot on GMA would be a dumb business decision that would repel viewers.

If you’re going to throw the Constitution in everyone’s faces (which I’ve got nothing against…) at least actually know what it means.

QUICK IT’S NOVEMBER: Be Thankful!!!!!

 

November, the month in which everyone suddenly becomes increasingly thankful.

Until that one day when we are supposed to be extra thankful, and then we just shove our faces and watch football, and if we’re super thankful, we go shopping.

But we’re not really anymore thankful in November than we are in say, October. We just put on a show, because, yeah, this is ‘Merica.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Thanksgiving, I like big meals, and all that jazz, I just hate that we pretend it’s our thankful day. And that SO LONG as we are thankful on the last Thursday in November, we’re covered for the rest of the year. Or if we’re thankful, at least according to our facebook statuses (not statii, but don’t get me started), for the whole month of November, thank DANG YOU ARE LIKE JESUS OR SOMETHING. LOOK AT ALL THAT THANKFULNESS WE GOT GOING ON UP IN HEEERE.

And there’s nothing wrong with it, or our silly little traditions, but I’m just tired of the fakeness.

I just wish we could actually really, legitimately be thankful year-round.

I just wonder, would we all be posting our ‘30 days of thankful’ if we lived in trailers? Would you be that thankful if you were living in the local mission? Would you be that thankful if you didn’t get to eat copious amount of turkey  in a few days?

And I’m not above it, I was pouting just the other day because I have to work on Thanksgiving.

Sure, I’m getting paid overtime for it, but I HAVE TO WORK ON THANKSGIVING DON’T THEY KNOW THIS IS A HOLY DAY OF AMERICA?!?!

Instead of being such a whiner, why am I not thankful that I have a job? And the car to get there? And shouldn’t I be thankful for the fact that there is actually something for me to miss out on on Thanksgiving?

And I’m not going to lie, I don’t think that shopping on Thanksgiving is one of the seven deadly sins. Sure, I wish I wasn’t one of the people working that day, and sure, I think that if you’re going to have your family and stuff in, you should probably hang out with them.

But I don’t think that shopping on Thanksgiving or Black Friday makes you into a greedy unthankful pig.

Nope, you can do that any day of the year. And if that camera you’ve been eyeing for a year goes on sale big time on Black Friday, and you’ve got the cash for it, GO GET IT. It doesn’t matter.

I’m sick of everyone talking about how we act like we are thankful on Thanksgiving and then go shopping the next day and OMG NOW YOU ARE NOT THANKFUL, YOU PIG.

And I’m not saying this to defend myself, I’ve been black friday shopping once, and I hated it, never doing it again, but just because you shop that day doesn’t make you ungrateful. Just like not shopping on Thanksgiving/black friday doesn’t make you thankful (regardless of that one article everybody is sharing on facebook, oops)

You can be greedy and selfish no matter what you do on Thanksgiving.

I guess my point is, if you’re a thankful person, you’re thankful, and if you shop on Thanksgiving, you’ll still be thankful at the end of the day.

And if you’re unthankful and don’t shop on Thanksgiving, but instead make a list of 8,000 things you are thankful for, you’ll still be unthankful at the end of the day.

So this year, instead of being thankful for 30 days, tops, let’s be thankful year round, and try to remember:

True thankfulness is not so fragile, it does not topple so easily that buying something on Black Friday completely destroys it.

 

Also, why do we eat turkey on Thanksgiving instead of eel, since that was like Squanto’s real fave?

 

When did being good at something become a crime?

 

You know, I like grace. And I like knowing that I don’t have to –and I can’t be perfect.

But my generation + others have turned this into some game of who can’t do the worst in life but still be alright. It’s a game of who can squeeze by just doing things half-way and still be likeable.

In fact, there is one SUPER popular blog (it’s a mom-ish blog, and yes, yes, I do read mom blogs on occasion) and I honestly do not know why people like this woman so much.  Her whole blog is about basically how much she sucks at life and is the worst mom ever. AND is proud of it. It’s a whole blog  centered around how much she fails as a mom, Christian, wife, blah, and it’s cool. It’s like, “you are the worst at everything, and you’re popular, so that validates my bad-ness.” I call it the World’s Best Underachiever blog. Actually, I’ve never said that out loud, but I’ve thought it. (Shh…I don’t actually know her in real life…so if you’re reading this, it’s likely not you…)

I’m not saying I’m perfect. Not at all. I burn stuff in the oven practically every time I use it. I fail tests. I wear ugly clothes 95% of the time. I have a short temper. I don’t like to talk about ‘how I feel.’ I’m too quick to judge. I don’t say the right things. I’m impatient.

And I’m not ashamed of those things, but I’m not proud of them.

But we’ve come into this weird thing, where we’re just settling with how we are.

I’m not saying we need to scramble to  become ‘the best we can be’ and all that jazz. But what I am saying is we need to keep pushing forward and to keep working. Be happy where you’re at, but don’t get stuck there.

There’s a difference between contentment and complacency.

And let me tell you something that will blow some people’s minds.

You are not perfect.

Seriously.

You have flaws.

And so do I.

But we’re in this new-agey sort of belief that hey, it’s fine to be an absolute wreck of a person, because you know, grace.

Grace.

Grace does not mean doing whatever the heck you feel like.

Grace does not mean you are okay the way you are.

Grace does not mean not changing.

 

Grace is the fact that we can’t be perfect. It’s impossible. And that’s okay, but that does not mean that you should be complacent. It doesn’t mean you can continue doing what you want.

But this is America, and you’re perfect.

WRONG AGAIN.

But back to this blog, this woman PROUDLY boasts about how bad she is.

At cooking, at being a mother, a wife, a Christian, a friend, and it’s awesome, because grace.

No.

Grace is what we receive IN SPITE OF our imperfections. Not because of them. Grace is not having to live ashamed of things you have done. But it’s not saying that what you have done wrong is alright.

So why do people all yell about how bad they are at everything? I’m not saying we should wave flags with all of our accomplishments on them, no, if you do that, I’ll smack you.  And I’m not saying we should hide our mistakes and pretend we are perfect. That’s being fake. And I despise that too, but that’s another rant for another day.

But why are we so proud of how imperfect we are?

Why are people boasting, screaming, shouting their imperfections?

And I’m not saying it’s wrong to be bad about something and make jokes about that, no. That’d be super hypocritical of me to say that.

But what I am saying is this:

It is OKAY to be good at something.

Seriously.

And it’s okay to talk about it. And to tell people your accomplishments. And to actually embrace the fact that you do something well. And use that something to do something awesome.

And you know what else is okay?

To work to improve that skill.

You know who is/was awesome at singing/performing? Julie Andrews.  (‘was’ because she lost her singing voice from throat surgery). And seriously, she and her family knew she was talented. But they didn’t say, “that’s great Julie, you’re perfect how you are, no need to work to improve yourself. You’re perfect.” No. She took voice lessons to work to improve upon the talent she was born with.

But you know, if we’re good at something, we have to be the best, right?

And I think that’s a lot of where we mess up.

Because of insecurity.

If I claim/act like/show/am not ashamed of the fact that I am good at something…well…people will know…and if they know…they can see when I do something wrong…

SO THE SOLUTION! Act like you’re bad at everything. Because that way---it doesn’t matter! If you claim to be a terrible tuba player—and then drop your tuba in concert, it’s fine, because, eh, you never said you were any good anyway.

BUT if you share with people your love of the tuba, tell them what you’ve been working on, and ARE GOOD AT IT, and then you miss a note during your mad tuba solo, well, then people will know that you, Mrs. Perfy McPerfect IS NOT PERFECT.

Shut. Up. No. Way.

So the solution for making sure no one ever sees our mistakes ever, is to blow up all the things we are bad at. Pretend we’re not good at anything. So to hide our downfalls, we proclaim them from the rooftops.

AND PLEASE. I am not saying we should hide our mistakes. And I’m not saying that we should scream our talents.

But when did being good at something become a crime?

Being a recipient of grace means you’re not allowed to be good at something.

Really.

It’s okay to be good at something. Promise.

Low enough to hate.

 

I’ve been thinking about this one for a while, but didn’t want to say anything while all the Martin/Zimmerman stuff was going on, because this has nothing to do with that. But even if I did write what I think about that, people on both sides would hate my guts and whatever, so you know…not that I don’t want to say anything controversial, but I think that horse has been beaten to death. A thousand million times. But um, anywho, moving on.

To the people who cry ‘racism’ to everything done wrong to a minority: shut up.

To the people who say racism doesn’t exist in the US: shut  up.

You’re both wrong.

See this photo:

That’s probably the coolest toddler you will (or won’t) ever meet. We’ve got a lot in common, like our love for french fries.

So we like to hang out and whatever.

Oh, but if you hadn’t noticed, he’s black. And I’m white.

So the other day, him and I were just hanging out at McDonald’s (with another brother who missed the photo) being crazy, eating French fries, trying not to climb up windows, that sort of stuff.

And people. Ugh, people.

They look at him, they look at me, they look back at him, they look back at me. Pass sort of a judgmental glare and walk along. This happens all the time.

Thanks guys, next time I need a stupid opinion--I’ll know where to ask.

And no one ever says anything, because you know, people are too kind for that. Though if someone did, I have a few good answers tucked in my pocket.

But it’s written all over their faces.

You really should be careful, because people can pick up on what you’re thinking a lot more than you think.

And maybe they’re just busy judging me ‘cause I look like I’m 13 and lugging around a baby. Maybe that’s it, I don’t know. But that’d still be rude, in my opinion, so racism or not, still wrong.

And not everybody is judgmental about it, but the ones who are make sure you can see it all over their faces. And I think it’s kind of funny. You’re judging me for walking around with a black baby, which last time I checked, was a totally moral thing to do. And you’re the one passing judgments on people you know nothing about. huh.

But do you want to hear something I heard one time?

“What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A bench can support a whole family.”

You know where I heard this?

At church. At freaking church.

This was a teenager, and there were supposedly mature adults who either heard that, or are deaf. But I’m pretty sure it’s the first. And they just stood there. Are you kidding me? I whipped my head around and said, “Seriously?!” I didn’t say anything else because I was too angry—and whatever came out of my mouth was not going to be sweet, so I shut up. But I wish I hadn’t. I wish I would have stood up, told this person off, and walked out of that building. I would have been just as well off that way, considering I spent the rest of church thinking about how stupid I thought this person was. And everyone else, all these mature adults, just stood around.  And before anyone tells me I shouldn’t be pointing people out, well I don’t even remember who exactly was there (maybe anger causes memory loss), but I do know it was 4-6 “men.”

“Well you’re a bit bitter, Bekah.” Yes. Yes, I am. Should I be? Probably not. But when people who are supposedly good Christian church people sit by in silence while people say this crap…yep, yeah, that does make me angry.

And then, here’s one, I heard this from someone at my house…which is even classier, considering two black people live here.

This is supposed to be a joke, apparently.

“What do you call a bunch of white people running down a hill? An avalanche. What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill? A coal mine. What do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A jailbreak.”

Ah, yes, but this time I could not hold my tongue. I yelled at this kid, told him to shut up, get out of my house, and to quit being stupid. Among other things, which I don’t remember entirely. I went to my room to semi-calm down/cry. It wasn’t exactly the most tactful thing I’ve ever done (tact has never really been my strong point), but I don’t really regret it. My friend Emily says it’s the angriest she’s ever seen me. It’s actually probably the angriest I’ve ever been. It’s one thing to say stupid stuff like that, it’s another to say it in the home of the people you are demeaning.

And I’m sorry that your self esteem is low enough that you have to put down an entire race. That must be an unpleasant way to live.

But I don’t think that’s the way to stop racism. Actually, I don’t know how. Because on one side, you get to the point of crying ‘racist’ at everything, and that’s wrong in and of itself. And on the other side, just ignoring it entirely. And it goes every direction. There are racist whites, blacks, Asians, Hispanics, Indians, whatever. And it’s not right for anybody.

But I do know this, a lot of it starts with kids parents. No kid is born and thinks, gee, I’m going to hate this group of people because their eyes are slanted. That’s ridiculous. No, kids are taught. And I have read stuff where people claim to be racists because of a bad thing this person of this race did to them one time.

Seriously?

So if I get robbed by a guy with blue eyes, I should hate all blue-eyed people.

Good thinking.

I could ramble on all day about what I think is or isn’t the end-all fix everything answer, but I don’t know. I really don’t.

What I  do know though, is that whether or not you can change anyone else, you can start with yourself.

And I do know that hating people who seem to be racists does nothing. I don’t think we can just waltz up to people and scream “LOOOVE EVERYBODY, YOU IDIOT!” No, that won’t work. And I don’t know what will, I don’t, and I don’t think there is an easy answer.

I don’t know, I really don’t, but I do know that everyone, on both ends of the racism spectrum, myself included, need to take the advice of basically the coolest civil rights activist, ever.

“Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.” –Martin Luther King, Jr.

If Instagram was more honest….

 

So. I’ll say it. I hate Instagram. I hate it almost as much as when people put Spanish or French or whatever as a language they speak after taking a couple of classes. No, you can order at a restaurant, congrats, but you don’t speak French. I think facebook should have a test, if you prove yourself to be pretty-dang-close to fluent, congrats, add it as a language, if not, too bad, continue being a wannabe (like me).

But that’s another rant for another day.

I made an account on Instagram once.. Deleted it after 5 minutes.

The first reason I hate it is because, well, I hate that now that most everyone has a phone that takes ‘decent’ pictures, we try to crap them up with filters. What is the point of that? Oh here is a half-decent photo, let me add a filter that blurs it and makes it look like I dropped the photo in water. Yes, that looks good.

No, no it doesn’t.

I’ve kind of got this thing against making good photos look vintage anyhow. Unless it’s like supposed to be recreating or something. I just have this thing against all sepia filters. Also, I avoid saying “sepia” like the plague, because I’m honestly not even sure how to say that.

The other reason, is because well, it’s just so fake. No one looks like that when they get up. People actually eat quinoa and like it? (my mother says she likes it, but I don’t even know how that is humanly possible).

So last not today or yesterday, I documented life, instagram style. I’m still new at this, so you know, don’t hold any noob mistakes against me.

Such a beautiful morning! Ready to get this day started! #earlybird #duckface #alldayeveryday

Oopsie, forgot to take a picture of my coffee when it was full. Always look at the positives in life. 1/4 full, not 3/4 empty. #coffee #morning #goodvibes

Cleaning makes me feel so good! The way your bathroom cabinets look reflects your life, are you going to have an orderly life or a confusing one? #organization #supertidy #whoneedsamaid

I just opened the Bible to take a picture so people would know how spiritual I am. #mildew

I love dressing up. Couldn’t figure out how to do any poses from Next Top Model, so I drew my inspo from Nacho Libre. #fancy #posing #imamodel #forgot #duckface

My gorgeous view today. I could just sit and look at it all day. #maps #toshiba #adobe #googlechrome

Loving getting pampered. So relaxing, but don’t you be idolizing my moisturizing #refreshing #lotion #feet

Ate a whole bag of Kroger brand tortilla chips for lunch. Healthy eating is my passion. #yumyum #processedchips

Me and that boy. He’s the highlight of my day #lovehim #xoxo #soulmates

Just chilling after lunch. Pimple don’t stand a chance with me around. #proactivisforweenies #letsgo #huah

Scrubbing the Java Chip frappucino I dumped all over the driver’s seat. #starbucks #coffeelove #dawndishsoap

Getting ready for bed. You can’t see it, but this tshirt has like, coffee stains on it. #Waynesboroplayasreppin #braids #tiredgirl

 

You know, maybe I’ve changed my mind…maybe I will get Instagram..

I wish everyone would just get over Marilyn Monroe.

 

People idolize people. It’s stupid, but it’s what happens. And in my opinion, one of the most OVERRATED people of all time…is Marilyn Monroe.

Yes, I have said it, I have blasphemed the name of the incredible Monroe. Sue me.

First off, let us take a little look at her actual size. So many people say she’s inspiring to just look how they look and all that jazz. And Marilyn was a big woman, so I can be too, woop-diddly-dee! I’m all for having a good body image (see this post), but I hate myths. And I hate when people just believe anything they read on the internet.

 

“Well it was on the internet, so it has to be true.”

But really.

I looked up her measurements from her dressmaker. The one’s from the studio were about an inch larger on everything…so keep that in mind, I’m going with skinny Marilyn, but the bigger Marilyn wasn’t much larger..

Bust: 36in

Waist: 22in

Hips: 36in.

Weight:118lbs

Okay, so going by Banana Republic’s sizing chart, today she would be size 8 top. And because she was curvy, it’s a little more difficult to tell pant size, she would wear somewhere from a 00 to a 2. Her dress size is also a bit tricky because of the curves, but it looks to me like either a 6 or an 8.

Wait.

You mean…not a 16?

YOU’RE WRONG I KNOW SHE WAS OVERWEIGHT BECAUSE I KNOW THESE THINGS AND INTERNET AND STUFF AND I LOVE MARILYN AND SHE INSPIRES ME AND AND AND

hey, your beef is with her dressmaker’s measurements, not me. Another thing to consider is the way sizes change, she may have been a 10 or whatever, but that doesn’t mean a whole lot in terms of our sizes today. And that quote about you being beautiful because you’re not a size 0, and society is ugly? Well, someone just made that up. Seriously. There was no such thing as a size 0 during Marilyn’s life. So if everyone could please quit quoting that, that’d be great.

I have a wedding dress from the 1970s (don’t ask), and it’s a size 8. I usually wear something from size 0 to size 2.

I make look like a fabulous 70s princess, but I can’t breathe.

That dress is hard to put on. The zipper is tight as all get out. It took my mom and my sister pulling it to get it up. The dress hasn’t been altered. It’s a size 8. Or at least it was in 1970ish. So she may have been a size 16, in the 1960s. But it’s not the same as todays sizes.

BUT WHYYY do all her clothes look like they’re going to pop off if she was so small?

Well, Marilyn, being the classy woman she was, was often sewn into her dresses because they were so tight. Well, shoot.

Which brings me to this misattributed quote:

No. No. No. First of all, if Marilyn did say this, she needed to take her own advice.

Dress maker Edith Head said this. Here she is with a couple of Oscars:

I love how she’s just like, “yeah, these are my Oscars, got a problem?”

She worked with Grace Kelly and Audrey Hepburn a bit. So tell me, who dressed more lady-ish: Marilyn, Audrey, or Grace? Hm. And I’m just now realizing her striking resemblance to Edna Mode. Oh, Disney Pixar, you sneaky little people.

But now that we’ve got that out of the way…here are some other not-so-outstanding things about Marilyn Monroe.

She quit school in 10th grade. And I know things happen, and circumstances are whatever, but that’s a fact. She quit to be married to a man whom she was married to for 4 years.

In 1950, she had surgery to “fix” her nose and chin. How’s that for true beauty and accepting yourself?

She was married 3 times. Her longest marriage lasted 5 years.

And probably the most overlooked one of all time: She had an affair with the president. The president. And with others. But definitely with the president. What a smart move. Like, if that doesn’t prevent people from idolizing her, I don’t know what would. And I know, I know, the president was the married one, and he was wrong too. You’re dang right JFK was wrong, but hey, I can only rant about one person at a time.

And I understand there are broken people, and I understand redemption, but there is no Marilyn recovery story. She lived that lifestyle until she died. And it’s sad as anything. I don’t hate the person who was Monroe, I hate the way she is idolized. I hate that people think her life is something to look up to. I hate that people use her broken, messed-up, lost life to justify their actions.

She was sad person. There’s heavy evidence that she was abused as a child. She was passed around from person to person as a kid. I believe she was looking for what a lot of people search for: love.

And she got it, in one sense of the word.

But I hope that no one else has to live through what Marilyn lived through. And I hope no one wants to live that life.

And you know, I don’t think her life is really something you’d want to repeat. She’s no role model.

“No one ever told me I was pretty when I was a little girl. All little girls should be told they’re pretty, even if they aren’t.” –Marilyn Monroe.

 

Source was mostly this: http://www.marilynmonroepages.com/facts/ (kind of ironic, since it’s like a fan page..) Anything I couldn’t find there was probably from Wikipedia.

Rage against the Girl of the Year

 

Well, I just saw a commercial for the new American Girl movie…for “Saige.”

Now, let me tell you something heartbreaking about Saige.

She’s the new girl at school and she likes to draw…and in a shocking turn of events, her school’s art program is cut, due to budget cuts.

THE HORRORS.

Seriously, there is an hour and a half long movie about a girl saving her art program. How interesting.

I mean, the American girl movies were never exactly high quality, high budget productions, but they were better than that. And besides, we had the books to read. And my American Girls faced trials harder than budget cuts.

Kaya was a Native American with a blind sister.

Felicity was growing up during the Revolutionary War, her best friend was a loyalist.

Josefina lived without a mother.

Kirsten immigrated from Sweden to Minnesota.

Addy, you know, just escaped from slavery.

Samantha a rich girl, befriends a super poor orphan girl.

Kit lived during the Great Depression.

Molly grew up during World War II, and her dad was deployed.

Saige went to a new school and her art classes were cut.

Cry me a river, Saige.

I mean, really?

There are books and a movie about art classes being cut? Sounds thrilling.

And isn’t American Girl’s mission to like, teach and empower girls? And sue me, but I kind of really like the idea of historical girls better. And they’re not out of history. There’s no gold rush doll, no 1950s doll, no eskimo doll, you get the point.

And um, maybe I’m just acting like a grumpy old person, but American Girls used to be a lot cooler. And since American Girl’s mission is “to help girls be the best they can be” well, they’re kind of doing a bad job of that.

Oh, look I’m Addy, and I’m just you know, escaping from slavery with my mom.

And I’m Saige my art classes are cancelled and my horse gets hurt.

Saige, you inspire me.

 I’ve always kind of thought the girl of the year dolls were stupid. Like even when I was 11, I thought it was dumb.

But I guess American Girl is just catering to their customers.

We like relatable things you know. So a girl who’s happiness is so fragile, that when her art program is cut, that crushes her, well, we can relate to her lameness and her insignificant problems. We can’t relate to anyone living in real struggle, because we don’t know really know struggle. So we make up for that by making our insignificant problems into some big deal, when really, it’s just like, hey, I know gas is $50 a tank, but suck it up and get on with your life.

I think we’re all girls of the year sometimes.

Whining about our stupid problems, thinking things are worse than they are.

And at the same time, there is a Kirsten, a refugee looking for a home.

Or a Kit, someone living through their own great depression.

Or a Molly, with a loved on gone.

And we get to decide, we get to be whiny-butt Saiges who need to get a handle on reality, or butt-kicking, prejudice overcoming Samanthas.

Are we going to do something to make a difference?

 

Oh, and just a bit of a disclaimer, I haven’t actually read the book, I just saw the commercial and read the Wiki article. Which was enough for me. And what kid names their horse Picasso? Saige, you little weirdo.

Also, I’m just a tad bit weirded out/ashamed that I just spent however long writing a rant about dolls. Oh, hi yes, my name’s Bekah, I’m a college sophomore and I like to complain about dolls. herrrrrshner.

Eh. Whatever.

I hope my dead relatives aren’t watching.

 

So, whenever someone dies, people either think that a) they become angels or b) they’re going to be up in heaven creeping on their friends and relatives until all of them die. Well, either way you’re wrong.

Standing in that terribly awkward line at the funeral home and having all these strangers telling you that your lost loved one is looking down at you smiling…I’m sorry, but they’re happy we’re all standing in this line being sad and whatever because they died? Well, that makes no sense. Unless they have that weird disorder where you get pleasure from other people’s pain, I can’t remember the word for it, I think it’s German, but anyway….

I’m sorry, but telling me that my grandma is looking down on me as I do stuff is not comforting. Sure, it’d be nice to believe that my deceased grandparents were “there” while I graduated and other junk like that,  but wouldn’t that mean they could see me do stupid crap too?

And I’m fairly certain no one says, “Well, bless her little heart.” in heaven. And if I’m right, that pretty much rules out my grandma from seeing me doing anything dumb. And pretty much all southern women, for that matter.

Also, if heaven is really joyful and pain free….wouldn’t seeing your living friends relatives be idiots kind of be painful?

“Oh, look at my grandchildren being idiots. Someone tell them to stop.”

And um, I’m not the only relative someone has…so if they can float around and watch us all, at the same time, at any time, isn’t that kind of equating them with God? Huh.

I mean, they were cool people, but they weren’t/aren’t gods. (well, I just gave it away, I’m not a Mormon)

Also…if they’re “always watching” like Roz, does that mean like, when I got my wisdom teeth ripped out and had blood dripping out my mouth….they were watching? How comforting.

LOOK Y’ALL! LOOK AT HOW UNCOMFORTABLE I AM. THANK GOD YOU CAN SEE ME IN PAIN!!!

No. no. no. no. no.

Maybe I’m missing something, but it doesn’t make any sense to me.

And absolutely it sounds much nicer to say, “Well, I know he’s looking down from heaven, so proud of you.” But just because something sounds nice doesn’t mean it’s true.

I can also say, “Well, if I just buy from the FEED line at Target, I’ll be able to end poverty in the United States.” Well, hate to break it to you, that’s not true either, despite what the commercials say.

Welcome to reality. Ain’t it fun?

 

p.s. If y’all actually can look down, and I’m just greatly misled…well…sorry, oops. And grandma…I took an old wig from your house. I’ve gotten good use out of it though.

Change & Stability

 

If you know me very well at all, you’ll know I spend a good deal of time here:

Dun dun dun. My desk of doom.

I’ve got everything I need: books, nail polish, camera charger, highlighters, gel pens, cute paper clips, coloring pages, headphones, sticky notes, and an um, tripod..

When I’m done with people, I go there. When I’m frustrated, I go there. When I’m happy, I go there. When I don’t know what else to do, I go there.

As dumb as it sounds, I use school as an escape from reality. School is my hobby.

That desk provides me with a sense of stability. It’s staying there for a while, and I’ll have something to study for at least another year and a half.

I’m at that ‘awkward stage’ again, though I don’t think I ever really got out of it the first time.

It’s no secret, I can’t exactly brag about the number of friends I have. And I like it that way.

But it’s going to be harder now, ‘cause everybody is going places and doing things.

And I’m happy for them, I am.

But it’s no secret, I hate change. I want things to stay the same forever.

If life could forever by 2013, that’d be okay with me.

And the only real tangible thing in my life that won’t change:

Stability.

I’m also a lover of plans. I like to plan things, and I like the plan to work out perfectly. But you know, that doesn’t always work out. Because things change.

But I have a nice little webpage showing me what’s happening in my academic life for the next 2 years. And that is wonderful to me.

Stability.

But you know, I think sometimes I miss out on life while sitting in front of my desk. Stability is a good thing. But instability isn’t all half bad either. And change, well, change can be good or bad. But I need to quit being afraid of it, which is much easier said than done. But even if I never do, I need to move out from behind the desk once and a while, and experience life.

And feel the coolness.

 

Look for the beauty in every day life.

And feel the rain.

And laugh a little.

 

Because whether or not I like it, things change.

And either I can pretend things aren’t changing, and sit in my room, knee deep in books about Lincoln, the French Revolutions, and Piaget’s theories, thanking God for the seeming stability of school.

Or I can enjoy life as it is now. And look forward to life as it will be.

The more things stay the same, the more they seem to change.

And there’s nothing I can do to stop change.

And that’s okay.

Because if I had it my way, nothing would ever change.

And my life, despite my hatred of change, would look a lot different if I had never experienced change.

Like my bangs would still be like those weird middle school “side bangs”

And I still would think this is a decent photo:

So I don’t know that I’ll ever be a huge fan of change, but just because things will change doesn’t mean I should shun the things that might.

Change isn’t all bad, change can bring good things.

Thinking back, if some things in my life hadn’t changed, things would be a lot different. And I’m, for the most part, glad my life looks the way it  does right now.

I need to get out from behind the desk.

And embrace life. Changing or not.

 

I Hope Everybody Gets Laid Off

 

I don't know why, but the modesty issue is really super popular this year.
And I won't pretend to know the answer to all the questions, even though I think I do sometimes.

But this is less about modesty and more about self-worth.
When I walk into Wal-mart, when I go to the park, when I walk downtown, when I scroll down my facebook feed, I am embarrassed. And sad.

Not because of immodesty, really. But because everyone is failing to see their value, their worth.

People wear certain things, do certain things, just to get noticed. To be respected, to be validated.

Let me tell you this: you don't need to be validated by people. You're cool how you are, seriously.

If having everything falling out of everywhere is really the only way to get people to like you, do you really even want those people liking you?

And I'm sorry if you do, because you don't need that.

If no one ever again tells you that you are pretty, if you never receive another compliment, that doesn't decrease your worth.

If you dress like a floozy and flirt with every person, that doesn't decrease your worth. But it sure as anything doesn't increase it.

Someone's failure to see the value of you, does NOT decrease your value.
Got that?

And really, you're just as pretty when you're wearing a three-sizes-too-big t-shirt and jeans as when you are wearing a skin tight, low cut, barely-covers-your-butt dress.
Seriously.

Actually I'll go ahead and make a wild guess that people actually pay more attention to you as a person, your character, your interests, your passions, your convictions when you’re wearing the t-shirt and jeans.

And here's another thing. Beauty isn't the end all thing.

If you are the physically prettiest person in the world, but do absolutely nothing with your life, of what value is that?

If everybody thinks your hot, but no one could name one thing you stand for or believe, of what value is that?

That's the thing, if you are the ugliest person on earth, but you take your life, and you do something that matters, you make a difference, that is beautiful.

Similarly, If you're People magazine's "Sexiest Person Alive"4 years running, but you spend your life being narcissistic and self centered, doing nothing of eternal value, that is ugly.

So here’s a question:

If for the rest of your life you were forced to wear a frumpy long-sleeved dress that was 3 sizes too big, what would change? Would your identity be lost? Or would you think, “dang. this is kind of ugly.” maybe pout for a day or so, and then get on with your life?

You know who was a really unattractive person?

Mother Teresa.

She didn’t just say, “Well, shoot, if only I was 6’1” and had sandy blonde hair.”

But what she did, her actions, her life, is a beautiful story. She was a beautiful woman.

And there’s nothing wrong with being pretty, dressing nice, don’t get me wrong.

But don’t let your appearance alone take the place of who you are, because you are so much more.

And let’s be real, ‘pretty’ is such a socially defined thing. Only some lucky people are born into society’s definition of pretty, and the rest of us are supposed to work towards it. Dye our hair, lose weight, gain weight, wear these clothes, those shoes. And then heaven forbid, a few years from now ‘pretty’ will be a totally different thing, and you’ll have to work to get there.

It’s like a full-time job.

And I hope everybody gets laid off.

The dreaded college question

 

so…it’s the question.

the question that I hate.

I actually don’t hate it, I’d love to sit down and tell you what I’m doing for college.

But, I hate seeing the person you haven’t seen for 5 years in a grocery store and having them ask, “so where are you going  to college?” Kind of like it’s a requirement to get out of this place and further my education, and those who don’t, well, you’re weird. But that’s another rant for another day.

But it’s awkward, because anything more than, “I’m going to JMU and majoring in candle-making.” is more than people want to hear.

But what I’m doing, sounds ultra creepy and kind of fake when you give the 3 second answer. (hey, I thought it was creepy too!)

So here’s the long answer, if you care.

I’m going to get a Bachelor’s in International Studies through Thomas Edison State College. (which is  accredited, so I don’t care if you’ve never heard of it.)

I’m doing so through a program called CollegePlus.

Now, you don’t have to us CollegePlus to get a degree this way, but they know what they’re doing, have done it zillions of times before, and take a lot of the work off of me.

And people are like, “why aren’t you taking classes, freak?” and I’m like, “I’ll take classes when I want to, GOSH.”

But really, I have taken 2 classes so far, I’m taking a Spanish class this summer, and I’ll be taking more this fall.

But right now I’m focusing on CLEP tests, which are tests that are basically like the final exam of a class, if you score high enough on the CLEP, you get the credits, if you don’t, you fail, lose money, cry in the car, and have to wait 6 months to take it again. But that’s a different story.

And then there’s a different kind of test, which are also written by College Board, and they are DSSTs, which are a bit longer than the CLEPs,  and are usually harder and more focused on one particular thing.

I can slam the learning for one class that normally would’ve taken a semester, into 2 weeks and still learn essentially the same material, but get the credits for a lot cheaper and faster. I do have to take actual upper-level classes though, so don’t get all weirded out on me.

So basically, I sit in my room and study a lot. And I’m doing school through the summer, which yes, is weird, and people give me weird looks, but when I have a Bachelor’s degree in 2 years, I won’t really care that I had to write a few sentences in Spanish over the summer, write a few essays, and take a few tests.

In case you’re still scratching your head and thinking I’m a creep, here’s my entire degree plan.

(* are the ones I’ve already completed. I don’t know why people always tell you that at the end, like I want to know what it means while I’m reading, not afterwards…)

General Education-60 credits

Composition 6 credits

College Composition ENC 101/102 CE  CLEP 6.0 credits

Humanities 12 credits
Ethics in America PHI 287 DE  DSST 3.0 credits 

*Spanish I SPA 101  Local College 4.0 credits

SPA 102 | Spanish II |  Local College 4.0 credits

Comparative Worldviews HUM 101  CP ACE Course  1.0 credits   (I’m splitting the credits with this one)

History and Social Sciences12 credits
Western Civilization I HIS 101 CE  CLEP 3.0 credits

Western Civilization II HIS 102 CE  CLEP 3.0 credits

World Geography GOG 230  TESC Course 3.0 credits

*Introductory Psychology PSY 101 CE  CLEP 3.0 credits

Science and Mathematics 12 credits
Introduction to Computing COS 101 DE  DSST  3.0 credits

Biology BIO 111/112 CE  CLEP6.0 credits

*Algebra ALEK 0002  ALEKS 3.0 credits

General Education Electives18 credits
*Social Justice from a Biblical Perspective SOS 299  CP ACE Course 3.0 credits

*Analyzing and Interpreting Literature LIT 291/292 CE  CLEP 6.0 credits

*Introductory Sociology SOC 101 CE  CLEP  3.0 credits

*Introduction to Educational Psychology PSY 230 CE  CLEP 3.0 credits

*Human Growth and Development PSY 211 CE  CLEP 3.0 credits

II - Area of Study 33 credits
100-200 Level15 credits
Modern Latin America HIS 252  BYU Course3.0 credits

Western Europe Since 1945 HIS 222 DE  DSST 3.0 credits

Introduction to the Modern Middle East HIST 309 DE  DSST 3.0 credits

Cultural Diversity SOCX 305  Excelsior Exam  3.0 credits

Introduction to Cultural and Social Anthropology ANTH 1003  LSU Course 3.0 credits

300-400 Level 18 credits
Conflict in International Relations POS 420  TESC Course  3.0 credits

International Relations I POS 315  TESC Course 3.0 credits

Liberal Arts Capstone LIB 495  TESC Course 3.0 credits

A History of the Vietnam War HIS 351 DE  DSST 3.0 credits

Introduction to World Religions REL 405 DE  DSST 3.0 credits

Global Issues and Society TESC Course  3.0 credits

III - Free Electives27 credits
Leadership Theory and Practice COMM 394  CP Course 3.0 credits

*Leadership & Influence IS 240a  FEMA Course 1.0 credits

Comparative Worldviews HUM 101  CP ACE Course 2.0 credits (heyy, there’s those extra split credits I was talking about!)

Human/Cultural Geography GOG 120 DE  DSST 3.0 credits

*Effective Communication IS 242a  FEMA Course 1.0 credits

*Developing and Managing Volunteers IS 244a  FEMA Course 1.0 credits

*Decision Making and Problem Solving IS 241a  FEMA Course 1.0 credits

Substance Abuse SOS 305 DE  DSST

3.0 credits General Anthropology ANT 101 DE  DSST 3.0 credits

Social Sciences and History SOS 101/102 CE  CLEP  6.0 credits

Criminal Justice AOJ 102 DE  DSST 3.0 credits

---

So yeah. That’s that. Totally legitimate, and a real, worked for degree. Just because someone does something faster or differently than you, doesn’t mean it’s the wrong way, or that they’re cheating.

Okay? Okay.

So to summarize, I am a skeptic, totally thought this whole deal was creepy before I signed on. But I no longer do, obviously. And you can think I’m weird or whatever (nothing new there) but if you do, at least be informed about why I am strange.

Okay.

El fin.

p.s. if you have any questions, I’ll gladly attempt to answer them.

p.p.s. If you weren’t counting, which you probably weren’t, I have 32 credits, which makes me a baby sophomore, which I’m pretty pumped about.

A letter to me.

 

I know they say older is wiser, but I'm afraid that's not always the case. Everyone always writes letters to their younger self, here's my letter to my 10 years older self. The me who is yet to exist, who I hope to be, and who I hope not to be.

Dear 2023 edition Rebekah,

You're kind of great, in case you had forgotten. Actually, you're not all that awesome, but don't let that make you feel like you're worthless, cause you're not.

Remember who you are simba, er, Bekah. You are a child of God, you are a sister, a daughter, a friend. And there are people who love you. And people who don't really like you, but eh.

You better have yourself a degree (or two!) by now, or I'm going to hit you once I get there. Utilize that degree. Don't let all the hard work you did go to waste. Even if it's just telling some random person a great cultural fun-fact. Oh, and you better be pretty darn good at Spanish by now. Are you up for a 3rd language? Because younger you was really hoping you'd be ambitious enough to go for it.

If you don’t have on already, you should totally splurge and buy yourself the 80mm lens you’ve been eyeing since you were 15. Unless that would be a totally irresponsible financial decision at this point…then just do what you’ve been doing for over a decade and drool over the Amazon page for it.

Don't settle for less, and don't compromise your beliefs. Be accepting, but don't compromise. Take the high road, don't seek revenge, it won't do you any good. And like Martin Luther King, Jr said, "Let no man pull you low enough to hate him."

Don't get too high and mighty for your own good. You can't singlehandedly save the world. Remember, you need Africa or Central America or wherever the heck your heart is right now, more than they need you. Never forget what you've seen, never forget how fortunate you are, never become complacent.

Please never take any duck face photos. I mean, you can take them jokingly all you want, but the first time you take one to try and look attractive, punch yourself in the forehead.

Don't ever become a people pleaser. Don't seek to make people mad or annoyed, but don't do things just to please other people, or to make them most comfortable, to fit into their little box they want you in.

Don't ever let what people think cause you to stray from whatever path God has put you on. Remember that people (including you!!) are dumb, but God is not. Walk in a manner worthy of the calling.

I hope you can still do the hoedown throwdown and sing every song from the Sound of Music. I hope you still think Princess Diaries is the best. I hope you never forget how awesome/strange snuggies were.

I'm kind of curious if you dress any better now than you did when this was being written. As in, do you still dress like a run-down stay at home mom? I hope so. Remember, comfort trumps fashion, no matter what pinterest says.

Just because you're old and boring doesn't mean you have to be old and boring. Do something, explore, try new things. Build a blanket fort every now and then.

Dude, your cat is probably dead, or like 23 (so let's just assume dead) I hope you didn't wake up one morning to find her dead cat body next to you. That would be traumatizing.

HAHAHA. You know what I just realized? You could totally be married by now. Well, if you are, I hope he's super weird and like all of your wedding pictures are of you making hideous faces at the camera.

You should do something spontaneous every now and then, I mean I know you sort of hate spontaneity and really enjoy having plans written in permanent markers, but you should probably try doing something unplanned.

Go listen to some of the music and watch some of the movies teenage you liked, feel free to judge yourself. I don’t mind at all.

Keep your eyes open, look for the beauty in everyday life. Slow down, don't get so caught up in life, that you miss your life. Don't fear the future, look forward to it! But not so much that you miss what is happening today and tomorrow.

Always remember that Mother Teresa quote about never knowing how much good a simple smile can do. And quit being such a grumpy cat. (I'm just assuming, you know, you're still a Mr. Grumpy Gills (shark bait hoohaha) quite often.

Wherever you are now, remember where you came from. Remember the Blue Ridge mountain view, the annual lady bug invasions, the historical sites markers on the side of every road. Remember getting stuck behind tractors on back roads, always seeing someone you know at grocery stores, and the deer being idiots and jumping out in the road every 4 seconds. Remember how much you enjoy mowing, remember your 'gorgeous' farmer's tan, and the way cool creek water feels in the summer.

But don’t remember to much. Not too the point where you get all stupid and worthless because you want to go back in time.  Keep pressing on. Do stuff.

See ya in 10 years,

Rebekah.

Segregation, WHAT? is this real life?

 

If you want to suddenly get this burning desire to slap someone, read any of these links:

http://abcnews.go.com/US/georgia-teens-fed-segregated-proms/story?id=18880791#.UV8dxJM3uSo

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-201_162-57578073/ga-students-fight-tradition-of-segregated-proms/

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/answer-sheet/wp/2013/04/05/georgia-students-fight-segregated-proms/

If you’re too lazy to click on the links (like I normally am) basically, there is a high school in Georgia that still has segregated proms. And it’s legal, because the proms are planned by parents and students and not the school board.

But this year a group of students is trying plan their own integrated prom, because they’re friends, and they rightfully think the idea of segregation is stupid.

What is this 1955?? Like really.

Stupid stupid stupid ignorance.

On either side, because from the way it sounds both white and black students/parents support the segregated proms. oh and homecomings too.

I’m sorry, but last time I checked someone’s awesome level had nothing to do with their skin color.

This is so stupid. I mean, usually I like to use a more broad vocabulary, at least when I write, but honestly the only word I can think of is: stupid.

So even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream. I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: 'We hold these truths to be self-evident; that all men are created equal." –Martin Luther King, Jr.

Yeah, we’re still working on that, I’m sorry to say.

April Self Portrait: Good Morning

The second of my self-portrait project I’ve taken on.

April’s title is “Good morning”

[some of the] companies that suck

 

Apple

Victoria’s Secret

Forever 21

Aeropostale

Urban Outfitters

Hershey

Faded Glory

Abercrombie and Fitch

Hollister

Skechers

Carter’s

Fruit of the Loom

Lacoste

Quiksilver

 

That is a list of companies that suck. Also a list of companies I will not be buying from in the future.

Why?

They use either child labor, slave labor, or something similar.

I’ve known about forced labor for a while. Passively known about it I guess.

I’ve seen the article titles that claim they will expose bad companies.

I’ve chosen not to read them, until today.

Why?

Because once you know, you’re responsible.

Responsibility isn’t always fun.

It’s harder to eat a Hershey bar knowing a child was probably forced to work to provide the cocoa Hershey uses.

I’m not saying I’ve never owned anything from any of those places. Because I have, and I do. I’m not going to destroy my ipad or burn any clothes I have from the listed companies. But I won’t be buying from them in the future.

Do you still want to buy that Mac knowing that someone was forced to assemble it?

hm.

And the companies I’ve listed aren’t just ones that might just seem a little sketchy. They’re ones that are definitely mistreating workers.

Not mistreating like we think of in the US like, “ughh, my stupid boss won’t let me take 3 weeks off to go to Malibu right after my maternity leave. Ughh.”

No. Like actual oppression.

But that’s okay, as long as our products are cheap, we still like them!

And then I think of all the American church programs, like VBS or something, that hand out products made by child slaves.

“We are so glad that we got our vbs program going and that we got all of our regular church attenders’ kids here by luring them with products made by children their age in 3rd world countries. That’s okay if a kid is being beaten, we got little Timmy here for his 4th year in a row. I mean really, let’s think about this…support slave labor and get Timmy here…or maybe make the kids miss chocolate this year..hmm”

GIHRQEWND

AGH

AGH AGH AGH

And maybe they don’t know the truth.

But it is our responsibility to seek the truth.

I’m not saying that I’ve been doing great, because I haven’t.

I have known, cared for a few minutes, and then moved on.

But it’s time to quit being indifferent.

“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.” –Desmond Tutu

 

We like to pretend we care about the real issues, but we don’t. We care more about what idiotic thing Lindsey Lohan has done now or what hideous outfit/hairstyle Miley Cyrus is wearing now.

We are choosing to be blind idiots.

And you can say, yeah, but what difference is one angry teenage girl who refuses to shop at Hollister going to make?

Touché.

If I never buy a product made by slave labor ever again, the chances are no, no major changes will happen. But I still can’t wear jeans from Aeropostale and pretend that everything is okay I can’t pretend, “No humans were harmed in the making of these jeans”

But if I stop.

But if you stop.

And your neighbor.

And my neighbor.

And people are made aware.

Change can happen.

 

Oh and a little baby high-five to Nestle for making some effort

“Nestlé agrees to hire a third-party monitor to examine child labor in its supply chain.For a decade now, the world has known that cocoa in West Africa is often harvested by children under difficult and dangerous conditions. That cocoa is purchased by the world’s leading chocolate companies and eventually becomes the chocolate treats that we all love to eat. For years, the advocacy community has pushed the chocolate industry to do more to combat this intractable problem. This year, Nestlé agreed to hire the Fair Labor Association, a nonprofit monitoring group, to look for child labor and other problems in the Côte d’Ivoire.”

 

Sources:

http://www.free2work.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/DOL-Tainted-Goods-2010.pdf

http://stopchildlabor.org/?p=2528

http://www.care2.com/causes/do-your-clothes-come-from-slave-labor.html

http://www.free2work.org/trends/apparel/Apparel-Industry-Trends-2012.pdf

Caught in the Middle.

 

So since my senior banquet last Saturday, I’ve been thinking, a dangerous pastime, I know.

I was always like…let’s do this. Let’s grow up. Let’s do it.

Wah.

I mean, I’m ready to graduate, don’t get me wrong.

but, um, yeah, I don’t know if I want to grow up. I still feel like I am a little girl. I mean, I am a little girl.

Like that is still me, I make that face seriously every day.

One minute, I think I’m like, “mhm. look at me all being a grown up.” and the next I’m like, “ohhh myy gosh. WHAT IS THIS MADNESS! I am a child.”

It’s kind of frighteningly exciting.

I don’t know.

I want to run around and tell every child to quit wishing they could grow up because I’m almost there and from what I can see, it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

And then I want to dance. and sing. because it’s the start of something new.

But I’m still a little girl in many ways.

Princess Diaries is still my favorite movie. I lick the spatula when no one is looking. Swinging is still fun. I got a tiny bit competitive playing hungry hungry hippos while I was recently playing with a 5 year old. I pick all of my nail polish off. I like to catch fireflies. I think blanket forts are fun.

But in some ways, I’m starting to be an adult.

I’ve got college credits under my belt. I can drive. I’ve had a “real” job.

But I’m not ready.

I wish I could go back to 10 years old. I miss playing with Barbies.

I don’t like to think about the future.

But sometimes I do.

I like to think about having a degree, and all the new opportunities I’ll have. Being a career girl and all.

But that is absolutely terrifying. Thinking about bills, responsibility, and pantsuits. (I really hope I never have a job which requires me to wear a pantsuit, ever.)

I had to answer some “life-planning” questions for school and one of them was:

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Um, yeah, honestly I have no idea. I mean on one hand I see myself living in a cute little apartment with a cat and working as a caseworker. On the other hand I see myself married, wearing sweatpants everyday, and living in a house with a little white picket fence. On another hand, I see myself getting my 5th degree or something weird like that. On the other hand I see myself living in Central America playing with babies, picking avocados, and walking around with unkempt hair and a baby monkey on my shoulder.

Apparently I need more hands. I mean right now the last option would definitely be the preferred. But I can’t say that’s the definite future. Or that I wouldn’t be happy in any of the other roles.

Because it’s weird.

I mean.

I don’t know.

I’m a child.

My brain isn’t even fully developed yet.

And here I am charting my life’s course.

Oh. goody.

So here I am, stuck in between little girl and…big girl?

Caught in the middle.

“Couldn’t wait to get going, but wasn’t quite ready to leave.”

I mostly just put that song here for that^ one line.

Also I want to know how she is laying in a field and not being bombed with grasshoppers?

One second I’m ready to move out and get on with life as soon as I am capable. A few minutes later I have decided to become a “career-child” and live in my parents’ basement forever.

I don’t want to be a little girl.

But I don’t want to grow up, not now, I wish I had a few more years of being a kid. I’m where 5-6-7-12-15 year old me was looking forward to, but um, I’ll take 8 year old me back, please.

I wish I had enjoyed knowing nothing and literally having no cares or not having to make any decisions. I wasn’t even thinking past…um lunchtime? And oh, now here I am, not even a decade later, having to buckle down and make things happen…

I want to grow up someday.

But I don’t know if I want to yet.

“ If we wait until we’re ready, we’ll be waiting for the rest of our lives.” –Lemony Snicket.

respect, just a little bit.

 

Ah, facebook. I get so many blog posts from you and your insanity.

Today I  bring to you, respect.

Not like anti-cyberbullying but just regular old respect.

Specifically for one certain family. The Obamas.

Sorry all of you conservatives, but it’s true.

Can you hate every decision the President has ever made in his life, ever? Suuuure. Fine by me.

But you cannot, absolutely cannot hate the president, as a human being. .

I saw a photo of Michelle on facebook in which she was being compared to a prostitute. That’s real classy, you’re getting your point across, real well.

Oh my gosh. Wow. That really is deep and convicting.

If you really can’t think of a better argument against someone than to compare his wife to a streetwalker, then you need to get a grip. (Okay, and seriously, I think it’s an ugly outfit, but it’s not trashy. I mean..)

 You can argue against the President’s policies or beliefs, or be unhappy with the amount he vacations or what-not. But when you start making fun of his or his family’s appearance, you’ve crossed the line.

What’s that saying, it goes something like, “We choose our president based on their appearance, and Miss America on her stance on politics.”

People. Seriously.

There are much better ways to defend your beliefs. Debate what you believe. Hate Obamacare? Then give some reasons why you hate it. Give some facts. Don’t share stupid pictures on the internet.

Defend your opinion, stand up for what you believe is right, but don’t attack the other person. What ever happened to attacking someone’s view or opinion and NOT the person.

It goes both ways though. Conservatives, liberals, independents, whatever.

Can we just show an ounce of respect?

And if we’re going to be sharing photos of politicians with captions, this is the kind I appreciate.

THIS IS THE STAAAAAAART OF SOMETHING NEEW

and this kid basically knows everything.

“when you were a kid did you say, ‘I wanna be boring and mean when I grow up.’? What?!”

DIDN’T THINK SO.

 

disclaimer: blah-dee-blah, this is in no way about any one person, so if you shared/liked the above photos, I don’t hate your guts or anything, I just think you’re being ridiculous. Sorry.

 

 

Oh and in other news, I’m writing over here a bit now…of course, what I say there is a bit less sarcastic and annoyed sounding, but you know.

OUR COUNTRY, OUR LANGUAGE. no. get over yourselves.

 

I don’t claim to know much about politics. But if I believed every thing I saw shared on facebook I would think:

• Obama is the antichrist
• Republicans are all greedy dirtbags
• Marco Rubio is dumb, because he is thirsty.
• Michelle Obama is an idiot, because GMA cares about her clothes.
• That the president and congress should be put on minimum wage. (okay, I get your point, people, but that is one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard.  are they overpaid? Probably. but I don’t think paying them 7.25 an hour would fix our country’s problems.)
• Obama singlehandedly, flew over to the Middle East and with his own hands shot Bin Laden.
• Obama had nothing at all to do with ending Bin Laden.
• Mitt Romney is the devil because his dog rode on top of his car.

So I guess point number one is, facebook is not the best place to get your news from..

But another thing I see a lot of, is: “if they are going to come to our country, they need to learn our language.”

And somehow people think as soon as a (legal) immigrant steps onto American soil they should immediately be fluent in English. and be well versed in everything American.

Guys, I have some news for you, learning a language is hard. It’s not like you can take an English 101 class or use Rosetta Stone for 6 months and be ready to take on the world. No. I’ve studied Spanish off and on for 4-5 years and I couldn’t go down to Honduras and say anything I felt like. It’s hard.

I understand why people don’t appreciate illegal immigrants, I totally get that, but you’re forgetting there are people who are legally here too. People who came to what is supposedly the best nation.

We’re not very hospitable are we? Our country, our language, we say. Learn our ways or get out.

I’m not saying that people should not make an earnest effort to learn English, absolutely they should. But let’s try to show  a little grace and kindness here people. Before you judge others for not knowing your language immediately, why don’t you try to learn a language? See how difficult that is. So let’s not jump to conclusions and believe everyone who is not completely fluent in English is here illegally.

When I was in Guatemala, I attempted to speak some Spanish, and you know what, there are times I know for a fact I was wrong, I would think about the conversations later that day and think, “ah man. Should’ve used esta not es. Shoot.” but the thing is, they didn’t stop and give me some judgemental “idiota” face. No. They just kept talking to me like nothing ever happened.

We like to pretend we are Jesus’ favorite nation. GOD BLESS AMERICA. say all the bumper stickers.

How do you think Jesus would have treated the family who had just (legally) immigrated from Chile?

Yeah, you’re right, He probably would have said something like, “Get out of our country. Learn our language,” or, “Get out, you don’t belong here.”

Actually, the Jesus I know probably would have stopped and gone out of his way to help that family. Helped teach them English, or at least made them feel welcome in this strange, new place.

I have a newsflash, y’all. You don’t own America.

Let’s say in a strange turn of events, Nicaragua really got itself together and turned out awesome, and the United States  crumbled, so some Americans immigrated down there. You’ve made a real effort to learn Spanish, but you’ve only had a year to prepare, so you can order at restaurants, and make it through a grocery store, but many things are still difficult for you. Think about how nice it would be to get people’s judgmental glares. Think about how great it would be to hear people say to each other under their breath, “si ellos estan en nuestro pais, ellos necesitan aprender nuestro idioma. ahora.”

Ah. Sweet hospitality.

Try stepping into someone else’s shoes. And another shocking fact: sharing the snarky photos on facebook does absolutely nothing to help get these people learning English. nothing. Actually if I was them, and I continually saw stuff like that, because I’m ornery, I would probably try to hold off learning.

Instead of being so harsh and rude, why can’t we just help? Why don’t we try to be a little more understanding. Let’s remember that while English is the most used language in the States, we have no official language. Let’s remember that at one time (unless you are 100% Native American), our ancestors were all immigrants.

 

And in the words of my favorite motivational speaker, Kid President, “If it doesn’t make the world better, don’t do it.”