I wrote this post: http://ramblingsbybekah.blogspot.com/2011/06/life-isnt-fair.html a while back.
It wasn’t even that long ago, but I can look back and tell you how those feelings were just the start of what is happening in my life now.
I’ll go ahead and be honest, when I was preparing for that trip to Guatemala in 2010, my thoughts weren’t really about the people there, or how God was going to use this trip to change me, or others. Nope. It was more about going somewhere, somewhere new. Don’t get me wrong, I love to travel, and I love going to new places, but I had it wrong, for that kind of trip at least.
I got there. It wasn’t really what I expected, I don’t know what I expected, but this wasn’t it. That week, I saw so much…and I learned much more than I had anticipated. Life wasn’t really all about me. I don’t have it bad and sometimes, I just need to grow up and get over myself.
Romans 15:1-2: We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. 2 Each of us should please our neighbors for their good, to build them up.
And then I came home, it wasn’t quite the parade and “ohhh Rebekah you are so incredible” like I had expected. Which now I feel like God was saying, P.S.: still not about you.
Then, in September 2011, I went to Ethiopia, we didn’t really do any “mission work” because I was there with my mom to pick up Teshale. But still, if you look right outside the window, and it’s there.
^that was actually taken from the window of the hotel we stayed in.
Then I went back to Guatemala this year, but with a little bit of a better mindset than before…and do you know the difference that made?
I have just recently started working towards a Bachelor’s degree in International Studies, the plan, after completing that is to “go-back” to school and get a second BA in Social Sciences.
Would I have made those decisions without having the opportunities to travel, like I have? I don’t know. I just know that I am glad that things have happened that have put me on this track. I don’t know if I’ll ever live in another country, I don’t know exactly what is going to happen in my life.
And that makes me think of this:
Psalm 37:5: Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.
I heard/read it once somewhere, I don’t even remember where now, that instead of this verse meaning “Pray and get everything you want.” That perhaps, it might mean something more along the lines of delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart, he will show you what the desires of your heart should be. Because if you really are delighting yourself in the Lord, won’t the desires of your heart be something more than “I want to get an iPhone 5” or wanting to be able to eat out every night? I don’t know, I’m not perfect and I don’t know everything, but I think that the more we “delight ourselves in the Lord” the less earthly desires we will have..
okay, I’ll stop rambling now….